Old Farting Advice
This is where I store old questions.

Ms. F. Art writes..
i have lost my sense of smell and do not know if i have ever let out a silent creeper when i am in public. how can i detect odours with my new disability?
AskCote responds...

Wow. I'm gonna have to whip out my old college books for this one. My medical reference books on anus blasts is over 5000 pages long. It's larger than the internet. Yes, the net is vast, but not as vast as my medical reference books on butt wind. You have a few options here. 1st, you could shove a 10 pound rat down your pants. When you fart, the rat will let you know. Any old Boston rat/small cow will do. Your second option would be to officially declare a disability within your state and get a handicap license plate. Thanks for tuning in to another show kids. Please feel free to feel the poop.

Quincybunny writes..
I'm all bloated & gassy over here waiting for you to release a new antifart. Pfaarrtt. Will i explode before you update???????
AskCote responds...

I have about 60 other questions on my backlog. You are number #19 of about 100. I'd say your question has been sitting around on my computer for over a year. Now, if someone held in a fart for over a year they would die. So, it ALMOST goes without saying, but I'm sorry to inform you that you are dead. I never knew I had the power to communicate with the dead. Thank you for this experience. It has added new meaning to my butt.

Idan writes..
i fart on my sister head it's agood thing or a bad thing?
AskCote responds...

This is a great thing. At a time when ethics and morals are down, we need to bind together with our families and friends and share our farts. Nothing says I love you like a wet fart on the forehead. God bless you and have a Kleenex.

The Fart Boy writes..
how can i download fart video from your site ?
AskCote responds...

Oh, look who it is! It's The Fart Boy! I haven't heard from you since the day I never meet you. Oh, the good times... On to your question... Yes the videos are on THE INTERNET. You may download them at any time. I hope that answers your question. If not, call 1-800-INTERNET. I'm driving my bike to work, because my car won't drive itself.

Danny Garing writes..
i fart ALL the time, when i run, when i sleep and EVEN when im SWIMMING!! what do i do???
AskCote responds...

Nothing. It's sounds like you are the happy parent of a 10 pound 10 ounce uncontrollable air biscuit maker. I suggest nothing. This is a 100% completely normal condition for someone who is a freak. I will recommend one thing. You should seriously consider contacting your local gas company for employment. On a side note, I just shit my pants. Thank you and have a nice day!

AskCote Archive

You could be the next person to get 15 bucks worth of FREE toilet paper! Read the FAQ.